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Future Plans?

I've been in an awfully pensieve mood lately... Thinking about the future and things like that. Its not doing much good brooding about the future, wondering whether your arrow will ever make it to what you're currently aiming for.

A couple of things got me thinking really hard...

***

Event #1 ~ Amanda's Birthday Surprise!

Well, it was really fun getting up earlier than usual on a Sunday morning and going to somebody's house to surprise her for her birthday. So me and my bros turned up at her doorstep. Late. By the time we came the surprise was sorta over, and everyone was sitting round the TV watching Pirate Master.

We cut the cake, played taboo and had lots of fun. But it being a birthday and all, we were writing stuff on Amanda's card.

Thats when it struck me. The curiousity of what the future would hold for me. My birthday was coming soon as well, and it made me wonder, what would I be like in years to come? How much would I change?

I came to a conclusion that it would be God's choice. I had God to consult, I had God to trust, and He would be the one to choose what I would become. And it would be the best in future situations. But some part of me was just itching to find out.

***

Event #2 ~ Post YE Meeting

After YE we went out to the coffee shop for some extra lunch, and the oldies went back to church for a meeting with aunty K. It was about something simple, about a new devotional material and the start of a one-on-one devotional initiative, which I was really excited about! It was something like what me and Rachel discussed sometime back, something that may be useful if done properly.

One recurring theme behind all the proceedings of the meeting was that... Us oldies were all gonna be retiring from YE. It hit me pretty hard. I knew it was coming, but I never really felt any emotions or thought about it until then. When I leave YE, would I come back to help? What would all my dear friends that I've come to love do?

Then I made up my mind. I was gonna stay and help in the worship ministry for YE. As a leader. Hopefully create new initiatives that help benefit the not only the musicians, WLs and PA people but also YE as a whole. And perhaps I will push for certain things that I believe will help draw the youth of YE closer to God.

***

Event #3 ~ An Surprising Departure

Shocking news was revealed to S03H on Tuesday... Someone who I had really grown to respect was gonna leave for further studies. It was my bio teacher, Mr Ong. We'd met him last year when our old bio tutor immigrated with her husband. I initially found him a bit weird, but he grew to be not only a great mentor but a good friend.

It made me think about my future path, my education, my career. What if I didn't meet my expectations in the As? What if my recommendation letters, CVs and Interviews weren't so good? What if I couldn't get into med school? What if I could never be a pathologist?

To tell the truth it worries me. Though I am utterly convinced that God chose this path for me, if I happen not to get the path I think He chose, it would shatter my spirit. I'm afraid that the time would come when I would begin to doubt. Just imagining that scenario scares me.

***

Yeah so thats what I've been thinking of lately. About the future. But I find reassurance in a song...

I have a living hope
I have a future
God has a plan for me!
Of this I'm sure, of this I'm sure!

Jesus you're my firm foundation
I know I can stand secure
Jesus you're my firm foundation
I put my hope in Your holy word
I put my hope in Your holy word

Gambatte everyone! Do not worry about tomorrow, tomorrow will worry about itself! I will try and remind myself over and over about that whenever I think of the uncertainties of the future!

=)

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