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Dark Clouds

It's pretty unusual and atypical for me, but over the past 2-3 weeks I've been living under a cloud of oppression, and I can't help but think its spiritual. Today with just some words of life from Andrew, it was lifted and somehow my vision was clear again. The past 2-3 weeks the burden of the future was very real to me. I was facing the end of my university life, with most of my friends already with a job or interviews, me thinking about the future. Essentially the problems I talked about in my return post on April 2nd... And I thank God for today He broke through my darkness and touched me.

This darkness had led me almost to despair in my service toward Him, thinking that perhaps the time was ripe for me to move on. A week plus or so ago God told me whilst I was running that it was time to be urgent, to quickly take active steps to inspire the youth because time was limited. In that cloud of darkness, I interpreted things wrongly... I thought that this message was specifically meant for me, that it was time for me to leave the ministry. It was because of the happenings within these 2-3 weeks, coupled with my hardness of heart at Kingdom Invasion, my lack of margin to learn how to love actively and my fatigue that made me think that way... But I'm glad I've seen the light! This sense of urgency is one anticipating great things in His kingdom, and a similar feeling God gave Andrew!

Andrew told me about the bigger spectrum of things, how God has bigger plans and how the small things that I've been caught up with will sort themselves out if I truly seek God first once again. And with those words of life it felt like the veil of darkness lifted, and with sudden clarity I saw the darkness for what it was. A spiritual attack. Well now I feel much better!

Well other updates include my passing IPPT last Tuesday! Woohoo! Now IPPT is going to get much easier, because at the age of 26 I shall advance into Category Y, which is the standard where all stations get easier. I thank God for that! Especially because my ankle hurt (from before Kingdom Invasion), but during the run there was no pain whatsoever! Might have been adrenaline, but I choose to believe that God helped me through that one! After all when I was doing practice runs it still hurt... Praise be to God! More testimonies to share!

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