Skip to main content

Imago Dei

Have been in emo mode since yesterday, but I've cheered up thanks to the tabulating I've been doing for the spiritual gifts inventory, and seeing how everyone fits in to create this wonderful youth group that we call YE.

Well, as usual it was internal turmoil that did the damage. And yes, once again it had something to do with my perfectionist self. Just can't reconcile the fact that I can treat others so nicely yet at the same time be so harsh on myself. When I'm with others the common sentences I'd use would be: "Its ok." or "No prob." or "Don't worry about it." or "Yeah sure." I'd say I'm an extremely laid back person, to the point of leniency towards others.

But the problem is when this side of me tries to assure myself that although I make mistakes its fine, I feel that its just excuses I make for myself. I want to push myself higher, become more serious about certain things and become stronger for God. And my nice self and perfectionist self just can't seem to click. Two total opposites in one body.

This weekend just didn't seem right, cos I felt I was making mistakes here and there, leaving things hanging and unfinished. But I guess that's not the important thing.

Sometimes I wonder how God can be just and loving at the same time. But He is. And in a way I'm exhibiting that nature of His with those two selves of me inside. And it reminds me that I'm Imago Dei - an image of God created in His likeness. Which is great. Time to embrace myself for who I am: the person that God knows full well described in Psalm 139, my all time favourite psalm.

And now I don't feel so bad any more. =)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Gamble

It's been quite some time since the last post, and time has just been ticking on. I'm entering a new phase in my career in a new office at Queenstown. Things are good on the work front, as I've been given a vote of confidence and responsibilities despite my young age. Eventually I'll be getting re-designated as a Team Leader, and looking forward to it! It's a sign that I am well versed enough in the work. Another part of my life that has been looking up - playing keys/bass for the newly created Saturday Service for church. I feel that spiritually things are well despite the turmoil of last year. A great sense of fulfillment and meaning whenever I do that, as if I'm back to my roots. In terms of leisure the usual things:  1. Soccer - Late night matches (back to the good old days) 2. PS4 - Trying to finish off Tales of Berseria, moving on to Assassins Creed: Origin thereafter 3. Anime - Still watching the good old stuff that is still going on (One Piece, Yu-Gi-Oh,...
Post a Comment
Read more

Digimon

 I'm feeling quite nostalgic and have been thinking about my childhood a lot recently. A lot of it is because of the retreat I just had with my CG members and how having such a retreat reminded me of days that were more slower paced and more relaxed.  It makes me want to relive some of my memories. Two ways that I've thought about is soccer - I've been watching some of the World Cup matches, and it reminds me of the late nights I had watching matches when I was 15 or so and just starting this blog. About how soccermugger came to be in the first place and how I wanted this platform to post about soccer scores and how I felt about the matches I watched. The other way is to watch old anime, and I'm thinking about revisiting the first ever anime I watched which was Digimon. It was televised in Mandarin at 8am, and I remember waking up early on the weekends to watch it fervently. Maybe its time to do that again.  In general I guess my inclinations are to be more at ease and ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Ride On

Recently things have been going really well. I've had a leadership position in my workplace for almost one year now and it is quite amazing how God has guided throughout the way. Despite this I feel that I have achieved the balance between my work, personal life and I'm in some sort of a flow that makes me satisfied about how things are going. I'm about to transition to another stage of it, and it feels that along the way God has prepared me each and every step. There's a lot to give thanks for.  Things are really cruising along. I've always liked a good, smooth drive and life feels that way at the moment. Its been a long time along a bumpy road but finally things feel right.  Praise be to God who calms the raging seas. Praise be to God who can be counted on for the hardest difficulties in life.  Not sure when the next post be, but I think if things carry on the way they are, more good posts are to come. 
Post a Comment
Read more