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Emo emo.

Sometimes I'm afraid of losing my focus. Ok correction. I'm very afraid. These days I've been feeling quite empty, like something is missing. Perhaps I'm missing a goal for ns as a whole, but maybe something more that I just can't put my finger on.

My service to God has... Diminished somewhat. Not in terms of the amount I'm doing. But for the attitude and commitment. Effects of ns? No idea. But these days I've been feeling guilty... I feel that I'm playing guitar, contributing in cell, going to SYC just to keep noticed by those around me. Its like you're beginning to fall from some high place, but you're trying to keep yourself there.

I know I still love Him, but some knots are beginning to get undone.

I think I'll need prayer...
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